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So, you’ve got a little kid birthday coming up, and you have no idea what to get the kid for a gift. I have an idea:

This is Katie and she’s swinging in a Durtbag. This was one of about 12 rides she got. We finally had to stop, because no one’s arms could take it, anymore. But she wasn’t done with the bag. If she couldn’t swing in it, she was going to sit in it and spent a good part of the evening just chilin’ in the Durtbag on the ground.

So the next time you need a baby/kid gift, consider heading over to Durtbagz.com and picking out a bag.

It’s cheap, it’s durable, and it gives you killer arms.

I’m not convinced.

I’m not convinced we’ve discovered the piece we need to complete and compliment this weird street sign.

See, this street sign is hilarious on it’s own, and whatever we add to it, has to enhance it. (Am I the only one that thinks of a girl with a boob job every time I hear “enhance”?). It has to go from incredible to ridonkulous.

The husband wanted me to just do the shirt with the sign, as-is. It’s already been done; I saw it in a couple of episodes of “Weeds” last season. Dang it! I’m not a copycat; I’m a Durtbag. So, we must continue to think.

I need ideas that are weird and unexpected. What the heck are these people running from?!?! A huge kitt-eh? A giant garden gnome?

OR what the heck are they flocking to? This can go either way, you know. A 24-hour, all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet? A building that just says “MASSAGE” on it? Lord knows, that place is a family affair.

People, I’ve come up with almost 30 signs on my own, before this. I think the least you can do is help me finish one. I mean, seriously, you act like I sit around and come up with signs all day. And maybe I do. But that’s neither here, nor there. I could still use the help.

Think harder, Durtbagz. If you can read this, you have a brain. If you have brain, you have a pulse. If you have a pulse, you can help me finish this got dam weird street sign.

The search continues…

Dose of Reality

Hi Durtbagz.

After experiencing a big dose of reality this past weekend, I want to talk about how important it is to not take yourself, or others, too seriously. After all, that’s really what weird street signs and Durtbagz.com is all about.

This past weekend, I was in Chicago for an “American Cancer Society” walk, in honor of my dear friend and college roommate, Megan McBride Franz. In March of 2008, she was diagnosed with stage IV colo-rectal cancer. It had metastasized on her liver by the time they realized she had cancer. In a pretty unfair 10 month fight, she lost her battle this past January 4, 2009. Three weeks after she turned 31.

We came to raise money and show support.  I have to say, the support part seems much more important, at this point, than the money.

I’ve learned a lot of things from Megan. From how to properly use a beer bong, to how to not care that you are the first and only person dancing at the party. Unfortunately, the most important thing I learned came from losing her.

What I learned was: This is it.

This is all we get, right here. Did you wake up today? Awesome, you are now awarded one more day to do something. One more day to live. We’ll see about tomorrow, but right now is what you’re given to work with. This is it.

How do you want to waste it? Getting mad at someone who didn’t use their turn signal? (guilty). Correcting someone who said “funner” instead of “more fun”? (not guilty. that’s an asshole thing to do). Getting annoyed that you’re the one that cleans the bathroom all the time? (guilty).

Or how do you want to spend it? Feeling good. Personally, I’d like to spend my day feeling good. I’m not saying everyday you bounce out of bed, singing U2’s “Beautiful Day”. I am saying, wake up, excited to see what happens with your life today. It doesn’t have to be earth shattering, it can just be feeling good.

Laughing makes me feel good.

Whether it’s at a movie, at someone who definitely takes themselves too seriously, or myself, I love laughing. And I’m pretty good at it. To me, there is almost nothing better than laughing until you’re crying. I just have to remind myself of that, every once in a while. Because, really, getting caught up and taking myself or anyone else too seriously is just a drag and not how I want to use my time. It’s way more valuable to me than that, since I have no idea how much I’m getting.

After being around Megan’s family and my college friends this weekend, it woke me up (again) to this reality. Today is all I get. And I’d like to spend it feeling good.

Have you had your laugh today, Durtbagz?

I have to say, I’m impressed with not just the amount of suggestions for this sign, but also for the quality of the suggestions. Well done, people.

I figured, since you had done your job and thrown out more than a few suggestions, I should at least throw you a bone and tell you which ones are in the running to be voted. What is that, you say? I’m having you vote again? Heck yes.

Here’s the deal, people. I make funny bags and novelty shirts at Durtbagz.com, FOR YOU. How can I know what to make, if you don’t tell me? You tell me what you like, I make it, you get it. It’s a win-win-win-win. Win.

These suggestions were given to me either on the last blog post or via Twitter, (@durtbagz if you want to follow me). I have compiled them, and picked my top choices.

So, here are the suggestions that I like, that you get to vote on for finishing this street sign:

freewaypeds

1. Running With Scissors (will put scissors in each of their hands. scissors will be exaggerrated so they are obvious)

2. Giant Vegetable (huge piece of broccoli, celery or peapod will be chasing people)

3. Giant Lobster (same as above, except lobster)

4. Pac Man (same as above, except Pac Man. maybe a ms. pac man…)

5. Giant Cow (same as above, except a cow. big, big cow)

6. Huge Walking Bar of Soap (so weird, it’s awesome)

7. Giant Wiener Dog (although, I don’t know if the sign is long enough…)

Okay people, once again, it is your duty as Durtbagz to choose your fate and finish this weird street sign.


Triathlon It Is

Wow. I asked you to help me pick the next weird street signs for Durtbagz, and you answered.

Latest Weird Street Signs at Durtbagz.com

Latest Weird Street Signs at Durtbagz.com

I hear you. Loud and clear.

Because of the seriousness of the lopsided vote, I’m changing the rules a little bit.

I know I said I’d be printing the top two winners. I lied. I’m only printing the triathlon sign because the vote was ridonculous.

So, you win. Triathlon shirts and bags will be available at Durtbagz.com next Wednesday. Boo. Yeah.

However, since I did say I wanted to print two signs, I am working on the second one. If you haven’t heard, I need your help finishing this sign. So, keep up the good work, and help me complete that sign, so we can get it rolling, too.

I need your help again, Durtbagz. See, the last vote we had was so lop-sided that I’m only going to print the sign that won, since it got 72% of the vote.

I was wondering why it was so drastic, until I realized that the other signs just weren’t that good. I know I can do better. I will do better. I’m 50% there, I just need you guys to finish it, so we can call it one of our own weird street signs.

This is the sign I’m working with:

What are we running from?

What are we running from?

The 50% that is missing, is the thing that is chasing them. What are they runing from? So far, we (me and some Twitter folk) have come up with a) a gigantic, crawling baby and b) Stay Puft Marshmallow Man and c) a giant cow.

I like these ideas and I want more to choose from, before deciding the final cut. Here is the criteria:

-Must be something you would not normally run from

-Must be something that looks weird, being gigantic

Leave your idears in the comments and then we’ll put them to a vote. You guys are great at voting. Nice work.

Bring the funny, people.

Head Bag Lady

That’s right, folks. It’s time to add to the Durtbagz weird street signs selection and I need your help to do it.

See, it doesn’t matter what I like, as far as the signs go, because I’m not buying them. So, I need your votes, to tell me which signs to print next. That way, you get what you want and I don’t have to guess at it. Which blows.

So, here are your choices. The top two will be winners.

I didn't say there could be no mullets at Durtbagz.com...

Arkansas State Bird

Super Wheelchair

Super Wheelchair

High School Ahead

High School Ahead

Triathlon

Triathlon

Lunch

Lunch

Now, before you vote, you need to think carefully on why you’re choosing the ones you are. Picture yourself asking for them as funny birthday gifts. Which one would you give as a gift to your friend who is obsessed with Ray Romano and loves WKRP reruns? These are the things that need to be considered before casting your vote.

You can vote multiple times, if you like. See if I care. You’re just digging your own grave if you screw around and vote differently every time.

Thanks and check back for the results!

Head Bag Lady